The Choices We Make
by DizzyDrea
Summary: Life is all about the choices we make. You can choose love, or you can let it choose you, for better or worse.


Title: The Choices We Make  
Author: DizzyDrea  
Summary: Life is all about the choices we make. You can choose love, or you can let it choose you, for better or worse.  
Rating: PG-13  
Spoilers: Ripple Effect  
Author's Notes: Well, I watched Ripple Effect last night. What a fun episode. There are so many great gifts to the fans in there that it's hard to spot them all. This was my third viewing (fourth if you count that I also watched the episode with audio commentary), and I still haven't seen it all. But one thing piqued my interest: all the innuendo about Sam's love life. No one ever specifically says who she's married to, although Peter DeLuise assumed that she'd married Cam on the first team through the gate (though the writer later said that he'd left it purposely vague so the fans could fill in the blanks). But I had another idea, about the Sam on maternity leave (the Janet and Martouf team). So here's what I think, in the form of a quick one-off. Oh, and just to make it make more sense, I changed a line from the last scene of the episode (since Sam is the one who asks where her counterpart is, and it wouldn't make sense for her to ask that for purposes of this story.) Enjoy.  
Disclaimer: Stargate and all its particulars is the property of MGM, Gekko, Double Secret, Acme Shark and a lot of other people who aren't me. I am doing this for fun and for practice. Mostly for fun.

ETA 7/13/15: I unearthed this on my hard drive this weekend and thought maybe I should publish it. I had intended to publish it at the same time I published _Then I Did_ , which was the only remaining unpublished story from Life's Sacred Blessings, as a sort of companion piece because they're both episode tags from the same episode. Then, I never got around to publishing the other one, so they both languished on my hard drive for literally years. This is an older fic, so I apologize for the quality. It's unedited, and done in an old style that I haven't written in for ages. Still, I like the story well enough as it is to publish it without trying to fuss with it first. That, and I'm just too busy - I've got a big bang to finish, so my attention is elsewhere.

~o~

Sam Carter poked her head into the room, expecting to find her friend, Janet Frasier. Well, at least an alternate universe version of her friend anyway. But the room's only occupant was an alternate Daniel Jackson.

"Hey," Daniel called, looking up from his journal to find her looking around uncomfortably.

"Hi," Sam said, edging into the room.

The two SG-1's had just gotten back from their aborted mission to the singularity, and after they'd fired the Asgard weapon into the wormhole, the first alternate SG-1 had successfully returned to their home universe. They'd begun the process of gathering the other teams, getting them ready to return home, but she was hoping to take advantage of the time they had before all the teams would be sent back through the wormholes to chat with her friend. She hadn't counted on running into another Daniel. Another anybody, really.

It had been disconcerting enough having at least twelve copies of herself running around the base, but then to add to the creep factor, they'd gone on the mission aboard the Prometheus with the first duplicate SG-1, only to have them go dark side and try to hijack the ship and take them to Pegasus to steal the ZPM. The fact that this Daniel had nothing to do with that whole mess didn't make it any easier. He looked like all the other Daniels, his desert cammos being the only giveaway that he was from another SG-1. Still, it was strange looking at a man who was her friend, only not.

"Was there something you needed?" he asked when the silence stretched on, an expectant smile on his face.

Sam shook herself out of her momentary reverie. "Sorry," she said. "I was looking for Janet. Have you seen her?"

"She just stepped out for a bit," he said.

"Oh," Sam said, slightly disappointed. Then she cocked her head as an idea formed. "Maybe you can help me."

"I'll try. Come on in," he said, offering her a seat at the table that had become their team's command center.

Sam stepped into the room and stopped at the table, but didn't sit down. She shuffled back and forth on her feet, uncomfortable with the question she was about to ask. But the curiosity was killing her.

"Where am I?" she blurted out, then shook her head. "I mean the me from your universe. Your SG-1 is commanded by Colonel Mitchell, the same as ours, but instead of me and Teal'c, it's Janet and Martouf. I'm just curious where I—where she is."

"Ah," Daniel said, smiling softly. He'd noticed her green utilities when she'd appeared at the door, but there had been several teams with those, and obviously not all of them had come from this universe. "You must be the Sam Carter from this universe," he said.

"Yeah," Sam said, exhaling a little, relieved that he'd figured it out.

"The Sam from my universe is at home on Earth," he said, his eyes twinkling with some private joy. "She just had a baby."

Sam gasped in shock. She could honestly say that was the last thing she was expecting, so it took her completely off guard. Daniel chuckled a little at her reaction, causing her to blush with embarrassment.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I just—you surprised me, is all. I wasn't expecting that."

"Neither was she," Daniel said. At Sam's puzzled look, he elaborated. "She wasn't trying to get pregnant. It just…happened." He paused, then reached into the pocket of his jacket. "Here, see for yourself."

He moved around the table, coming to a stop just a few inches from her, holding out a piece of paper. Sam took it and looked. It was a picture of herself, or at least her alternate universe self, gazing down at the baby she was holding in her arms. The look on her face was filled with such love that it took her breath away.

"What's the baby's name?" she asked in a hushed voice.

"Abigail Marie," he said quietly. "Abby."

"She's beautiful," she said.

"Yes, she is," Daniel said, and the tone in his voice made Sam's head pop up, unsure all of a sudden who he was talking about. "That picture was taken when she was about a week old. She's two months now."

Sam's eyes returned to the picture, soaking in every detail. "She looks so…I don't know…maybe content is the right word."

"She is," a voice from behind her said.

It was a familiar voice, and Sam turned with a smile to see her long-dead friend. Tears welled up in her eyes, and Janet moved into the room and opened her arms. The two friends hugged for long moments, Janet understanding the need after her visit with this universe's Daniel and Teal'c.

When the two women finally pulled back, it was to see Daniel with a smile on his face. "Why don't you two stay here and catch up," he said. "I'll go find Mitchell. I hear we'll be going home soon."

"Thanks, Daniel," Janet said. They shared a long look, and then Daniel headed for the door.

"So," Sam said when they were alone. She took a seat at the table, and Janet sat down next to her.

"So," Janet repeated. "I'd imagine you have a lot of questions."

"I just—am I—is she really that happy?" Sam blurted out. She shook her head, chagrined at just how unmannerly she'd become in the last few minutes.

"Yes, you're really that happy," Janet said, as if confirming that Sam and her friend were one in the same. "When you came to me complaining that you hadn't been feeling well, I did the standard battery of tests. I put the pregnancy test at the bottom of the list just in case. You guys hadn't been seeing each other for very long, but I thought, 'What the heck.'"

Sam looked down at the picture she'd laid in front of her on the table. "Janet, who am I—who is Abby's father?"

Janet laid her hand over Sam's where it was fingering the edge of the picture, causing Sam to look up. "It's Daniel."

If Sam thought she'd been surprised before, she was downright shocked now. "Daniel?" she squeaked out, shaking her head. "But that's not—we're not—Daniel?"

"I take it you aren't together in this reality," she said gently.

"No," Sam said, shaking her head vigorously. "We're just friends."

Janet cocked her head, hearing the slight disappointment in her tone. They might be the same person genetically, but Janet could tell instantly that this wasn't her longtime friend. This Sam seemed to carry a burden that weighed her down. Her own Sam had been the same way, but that had all changed with Daniel. She'd been immeasurably happier since their first date, as if just sharing the load made all the difference. Maybe the same thing could be true with this Sam. At any rate, it couldn't hurt to nudge her in that direction.

"When Daniel ascended, you were heartbroken," Janet began. "It was as if the life had been sucked out of you. You seemed to fold in on yourself. Martouf couldn't even reach you."

"He said we were together for a while," Sam said, glancing over at the doctor.

"Yeah, you were," Janet said, a sad smile on her face. "Losing Daniel was sort of the death knell for your relationship, though."

Sam winced. "Is that why he seems so…" she said, unable to finish the thought.

"He still loves you, but he understands that he isn't what you need," Janet said. "When Daniel came back, that became apparent to everyone."

"How long did it take?" Sam asked, looking at Janet point blank. "How long after he came back did we get together?"

"I think it was about six months," Janet said. "You went with him to the opening of an exhibit on ancient Egypt that some of his colleagues from the university had arranged in memory of Doctor Jordan. You spent the whole weekend together in Chicago. When you got back, you couldn't stop smiling. You said you two had spent the whole weekend talking and laughing like a couple of teenagers. When I asked if he'd kissed you, you blushed to the roots of your hair."

As if on cue, Sam blushed and looked down at the table, her eyes catching the photo once more. She picked it up and looked at it longingly. "He said she wasn't planned."

"Nothing about your relationship was planned, but that's what makes it so special," Janet said, looking down at the picture. She'd taken it, during an exam, and it was one of her favorites. Looking up, she could see that Sam was now looking at her, waiting for her to continue. "He wanted to get married before the baby was born. You wanted to wait. You said you weren't going to get married in a dress that looked like a tent. And there was no guarantee that your father would be able to attend on such short notice."

"My father?" Sam asked, tears springing to her eyes at the thought.

"Yeah," Janet said, reading the sadness in her friend's expression. She squeezed the hand she still held. "In our reality he and Selmak are still very much alive."

Sam sniffed and wiped at the tears that were escaping from her eyes. "Good," Sam said, smiling tremulously. "I'm glad to know he's still around in at least two realities." At Janet's confused expression, she explained. "The first alternate SG-1 to come through the gate said that my father was still alive in their reality as well."

"Ah," Janet said, nodding in understanding. "So, I'm assuming you're not seeing anyone."

"No," Sam said, shaking her head. "I was engaged about a year ago, but I broke it off. He wasn't—well, let's just say it wasn't right. I was actually—" she stopped momentarily, embarrassed by what she was about to admit.

"You were what?" Janet prodded gently.

"I was hung up on General O'Neill for a long time," she said so softly that Janet had to strain to hear.

"You were in my reality, too," Janet said, causing Sam's eyes to widen. "But by the time Martouf came to Earth, you'd pretty much put it behind you. You told me once that the thing that was most attractive about him was that he was so like your father."

"He was," Sam said, glancing away as she remembered the Jack O'Neill of so long ago.

"The thing is," Janet said, drawing the other woman's attention back to her, "that not long ago you told me that Daniel reminds you of your father too, more so than the General ever did."

Sam smiled. "My father was always a sweet, kind man. He had a way of focusing on you that made you feel like you were the only person in the world. My mother always said that's what attracted her to him. That and his razor sharp wit. They could laugh and talk together for hours."

"It's the same with you and Daniel," Janet said, and it left Sam wondering if she was talking about her and Daniel or the Sam and Daniel from her universe.

Sam looked at her friend, really looked at her. "It's so good to have you back," she said. "I've missed our long talks, and all the advice you used to give me."

"Then let me give you one more piece of advice," Janet said, squeezing her friend's hand once more. "Life is all about the choices we make. You can choose love, or you can let it choose you, for better or worse. But, I don't think you'll find a better match in any universe. Jack is a good man, but Daniel is a good man for you."

Both women rose and hugged each other, Sam clinging just a little to the friend she knew she'd have to give up again in a few minutes. When they pulled apart, Sam looked back at the table and saw the picture. Picking it up, she held it out for Janet.

"I'm sure Daniel will want this back," she said.

Janet wrapped her hand around Sam's wrist and gently pushed the picture back towards her. "Keep it. Lord knows Daniel has enough. And who knows, maybe it'll remind you when you look at it that there are possibilities out there you didn't even think could exist."

Janet winked, and Sam smiled at her friend. Just then, Daniel turned the corner and popped his head into the room, Mitchell standing behind him in the doorway. "We're just about ready to go. Martouf will meet us up in the gateroom."

"Thanks, Daniel," Janet said, smiling and nodding at her teammate. Turning back to Sam, she shrugged. "I guess we'd better go."

Sam glanced down at the picture she was still holding, a small smile forming on her face. She tucked it into the pocket of her shirt as she turned to go. "C'mon. I'll walk you guys down there."

~&O&~

Sam and Janet, followed by Daniel and Mitchell, strode into the gateroom as the inner circle of the gate sped around in its dialing sequence. The atmosphere was a good deal more relaxed than it had been all day. This was the last alternate team to go home. The last bit of business before all their lives could get back to normal, or what passed for normal in their world.

Martouf stood beside Landry at the base of the ramp, along with this universe's Daniel and Cam. When he saw Sam enter with his team, he smiled. Sam broke from the group and crossed to where he stood, folding him into an embrace.

"Have all the other teams left, sir?" Janet asked as she approached the base of the ramp.

"You're the last ones to go," Landry replied.

Martouf released Sam from their hug and looked longingly into her eyes. Sam could see the sadness there, and felt now that she understood it.

"It was nice working with you again, Sam," he said, leaning in to peck her on the cheek. "Your presence has been sorely missed on our team."

"Just out of curiosity, where did she go?" Mitchell asked.

Janet just smiled and shook her head, moving towards Sam. "Maternity leave," she said with a smile.

Gasps of surprise and shocked looks followed her as she hugged her friend. The two women hugged long and hard, knowing this may very well be the last time they ever saw each other.

Janet pulled back and looked at her friend. "Think about what I said," she said quietly.

"I will," Sam said, smiling back.

"We have something for you," Landry said, breaking up the private moment.

Daniel held up a yellow hardcase, opening the lid to reveal the contents. Inside were a couple of dozen vials, along with two hard drives. Janet raised confused eyes to the general.

"The cure to the Prior's plague," he said.

Janet turned to her teammates, seeing their shocked expressions mirror her own. Turning back to the General, she gave a slightly watery smile. "Thank you, General."

Daniel locked up the case and then nodded to the Mitchell from Janet's team, who reached over and took the case just as the wormhole bloomed to life behind them. He then pulled Janet into a tight hug.

Pulling back, he smiled down at his friend. "It's good to see you again."

"You, too," she said, though it felt weird saying it since her own Daniel stood just a few feet behind her.

Teal'c stepped forward then, engulfing her in his arms, surprising her with the emotion in his gesture.

"May it not be the last time," he said as he pulled back, his intense affection for her shining in his eyes.

Janet nodded solemnly at her friend, who nodded in return. Then, she stepped back and joined her other teammates as they prepared to stride up the ramp.

"Well, we'd love to stay," she said, "but we have a planet to save."

The three of them walked up the ramp, and Martouf moved from Sam's side to join them. He paused for a moment beside her, looking once more into her eyes. Sam sensed that she must be a great deal like the Sam he'd loved on his world, and smiled softly at him.

"Bye," she said, squeezing his hand once before letting go.

"Bye," he said, then turned and made his way up the ramp and into the wormhole.

The wormhole shut down, and the gateroom was plunged into quiet once more.

"Well, that was…exciting," Daniel said after a moment.

"I could do without that kind of excitement, if you don't mind," Landry said, turning to head for the door.

"Indeed," Teal'c said, following the general out of the room.

"What, you didn't think it was interesting, meeting the you from another universe?" Cam asked, jogging to catch up to Teal'c. The two men disappeared down the corridor, leaving Sam and Daniel in the gateroom alone.

"It was good to see Janet again," he said, glancing at her profile as she stood looking at the gate.

Sam smiled, thinking again of the conversation she'd had with her friend, of the picture in her pocket, of the man standing next to her. Turning to Daniel, she spoke her mind.

"It was good to have closure," she said. "None of us got to say goodbye last time."

"Yeah," Daniel said, agreeing with his friend.

They both stood looking at the gate for a moment more, and then they turned and left the room.

~&O&~

"Hey, Sam," Daniel said as he stepped into her office hours later.

"Hey," she said, glancing up from her workbench.

"I thought you'd have gone home hours ago," he said, wandering the room, hands stuffed in the pockets of his green utilities.

Sam looked around herself in dismay. The lab was in complete disarray. Papers and computers were scattered around the room haphazardly. She and at least four of her counterparts had been working in there, until the number of duplicates had become greater than the capacity of the room. They'd chosen to relocate to an empty lab down the hall and the mess had simply been left.

Sam sighed. "I didn't want to leave the mess for later," she said, returning her attention to the papers she'd been trying to sort and stack for the last hour.

In truth, she didn't want to go home. Her conversation with Janet was still playing through her mind, and she was still no closer to a decision than when she'd started. She knew she had a tendency to over-think things, but she was unable to stop thinking through the possibilities. Would he want to start a relationship? Could she set aside years of friendship and see him in a new light? Could he?

She knew the only way to get the answers she was looking for was to talk to Daniel, but she was putting that conversation off as long as possible. She wasn't sure it wouldn't be embarrassing, especially if the idea had never crossed his mind. And how would she even start such a conversation? She had no idea, and wasn't looking forward to finding out.

"I guess I can understand that," Daniel said, startling her out of her momentary reverie.

He suspected there was something else on her mind, watching her out of the corner of his eye as she shook her head and returned to the papers before her. She'd been distracted since they'd come back from their aborted mission to close the tear. He knew she'd gone to see Janet, and wondered briefly if that conversation was the reason for her unsettled behavior.

He wandered over to her desk and spotted a photo sticking up out of the keyboard. He picked it up and looked at it, smiling softly at the image of Sam happily cradling a baby in her arms.

"Is this you with one of Mark's kids?" he asked over his shoulder.

He didn't turn around, or else he would have seen Sam stiffen slightly and then turn to face him. She'd honestly forgotten where she'd put the picture. It hadn't occurred to her to put it in a drawer where no one else would see it. It seemed that fate was calling her hand.

When the silence grew, Daniel turned around, thinking maybe she hadn't heard his question. He found Sam staring at him, an uncertain smile on her face. She crossed the room and leaned against her desk, and Daniel turned and settled beside her. She took the picture from him and smiled down at the image, running her finger over the baby's face.

"That's actually my daughter," she said softly. At Daniel's surprised gasp, she clarified. "The alternate me. Janet told me about her."

Daniel took the picture back and looked closely at the baby. "She's got some O'Neill in her, I think," he said.

"No, Daniel," Sam said, looking up to meet his eyes. "That baby is all Jackson."

Daniel's mouth formed into a silent 'o', and his eyebrows nearly disappeared into his hairline. He looked down at the picture again, running his eyes carefully over the image. Then his eyes rose back to meet Sam's.

"You…and me…I mean, the other you and me—" he stuttered helplessly.

Sam's heart sank a little. It appeared he hadn't considered the possibilities between them. She looked back down at the photo, hoping he couldn't see the disappointment in her eyes. She had known it was possible that this Daniel would never feel anything more than friendship for her, and before today she had never even entertained anything beyond friendship for him. But Janet's words had hit home with her, and it was disappointing to know that she might never find out if her old friend was right.

"She's about two months old now," she said, just to fill the silence, working to keep the sadness out of her voice.

Daniel looked down at the top of her head where she was bent slightly over the picture. A sudden rush of something he couldn't explain filled him. He'd caught the look in her eyes, and felt the clench in his heart at the knowledge that she was somehow disappointed at his surprise. He wasn't sure how he felt about that—about any of it.

Casting about for a safe question, he asked, "What's her name?"

"Abigail Marie," Sam said, sitting up, though not meeting his eyes. "They call her Abby."

"Abigail…my grandmother's name," he said. Sam's eyes flicked up to meet his for a moment, and he saw the question in them. "My father's mother was Abigail. Abigail Reston."

Sam nodded. "And Marie for my mom," she said, filling in the other blank.

Daniel nodded in return, then turned his attention back to the photo. He saw how happy Sam was, how much love she held in the gaze she was directing at her daughter. He looked up again to find Sam looking down at the picture, a look of longing on her face. Something blossomed to life inside him, an old familiar longing that he had banked away but never fully rid himself of.

He reached out to her, tilting her chin up with his fingers. His eyes caught and held hers, searching for something he hardly dared put into words. Slowly, he moved forward, his gaze flicking between her eyes and her lips, making his intention clear, giving her time to back away. But she stayed where she was, and Daniel finally closed the distance between them, settling his lips gently on hers. The kiss was soft and lingering, a gentle joining, and Daniel felt his heart stir in his chest, as if it had settled now that it had found its right place.

Sam sighed as Daniel pulled back, hearing his answering sigh as the world tilted and then righted itself again. She sat still for a moment, eyes still closed, her hand at the nape of his neck, savoring the lingering taste of his kiss. She still felt the heat in her cheeks, and her heart was stubbornly refusing to settle into a more normal pattern. She opened her eyes, knowing the wonder of the moment still showed on her face, and wondering what Daniel's face would show.

"Wow," Daniel whispered, and Sam smiled her agreement.

She could see now the clear wonder on his face, a mirror of her own. They sat there for a few moments, looking at each other, really seeing each other for the first time.

"I didn't think that you—" she said, but he laid a finger on her lips to stop her.

"I know," he said, dropping his hand down to cradle her face. "I didn't think so either."

"I guess we were both wrong," she said, earning a chuckle.

He smiled at her then, a small, gentle smile. "I got used to being alone," he said quietly. "I thought I would always be alone."

"You didn't have to be," she said.

Daniel shrugged. "Sometimes it was just easier that way."

"Yeah," she said, agreeing with the sentiment.

She had chosen to be alone rather than bounce between one crush and another, while Daniel had suffered loss after loss. Being alone had seemed the only way to handle the hurt. But what had they missed, being alone?

"What did Janet say to you?" he asked.

Sam gave another small smile. "She said that life is all about the choices we make. And that we can choose love, or let it choose us and take our chances that it won't turn out bad." She thought about telling him what she'd said about him and Jack, but decided against it. There would be time for that, of that she was now sure.

"She always was a smart lady," he said, his admiration for their friend clear in his voice.

"So, what now?" she asked. She was afraid to break the moment, but at the same time, the future was where they lived their lives, and she didn't want to linger here when there was so much more to be discovered.

Daniel rubbed his thumb gently across Sam's cheek. There was so much he wanted to say, so much he wanted to do. But above all, he wanted to take the steps in the right order. He wanted to do this right. He may never get another chance like this again, and he wanted to enjoy the whole process.

"Will you have dinner with me?" he asked urgently. "Now. Tonight."

Sam's smile became brilliant. "Yes, I'd like that," she said.

Daniel leaned in and kissed her once more, gently, a promise of things to come. Then he pulled back and looked down at the picture in his hand. "You can tell me all about Abby," he said affectionately.

"I'll meet you topside in thirty?" she asked hopefully.

Daniel's eyes rose to meet hers. "I'm looking forward to it," he said in a low voice, sending shivers down her spine.

He pressed the photo into her hand and rose from the desk, shoving his hands into his pockets as he crossed the room. He paused at the doorway, turning to wink at Sam before he strode out into the hallway, a smile lighting his face.

Sam laughed, letting out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. She wondered what Janet would say if she knew what had just happened. 'About time' were the words that came to mind, and Sam shook her head, a smile spreading across her face at the thought.

She looked across her lab at the workbench, still covered with papers. Squaring her shoulders, she tucked the photo back into her keyboard and headed for the door. Tonight, she would choose love. The paperwork could wait until tomorrow.

~Finis


End file.
